


Miracles in the City

by rainbowflavored_fiction



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Buzzfeed AU, Christmas AU, EDIT: this story now takes place in 2014, F/F, Hollstein - Freeform, Hurt/Comfort, Other, or the story where carmilla is in love and Laura denies her for ten thousand words, youtube au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-25
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2019-02-20 03:59:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13138623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainbowflavored_fiction/pseuds/rainbowflavored_fiction
Summary: Carmilla and Laura work at Buzzfeed. Everyone knows that they have broken up years ago, but no one knows exactly why. When comments start to pour in on recent videos about fans shipping the two, enjoying the moments they have on screen together, Lafontaine takes it upon themself to solve this mess once and for all, and get the two back together. Their plan? Handcuff them together for twenty-four hours. The result? They prayed for a miracle.aka the buzzfeed au nobody wanted. but I wrote it anyways.





	Miracles in the City

**Author's Note:**

  * For [nervedamaged](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nervedamaged/gifts).



> merry Christmas, my loves. hope you all were safe and happy on this day for those who were traveling and visiting family. this special fic is dedicated to a special someone named my-mechanical-heart, or Vicki! *waves from my corner of the internet* hi, dear! just wanted to say you're super talented at digital art and I'm honored I'm your secret Santa, hope this lives up to expectations!! I had fun writing this fic, even tho it was emotionally difficult to write Hollstein broken up. never again. now you fools shall suffer with me.  
> welp, enjoy guys, gals, and non-binary pals! and especially you, Vicki dear!

**November 25, 2014**

**2:05 am.**

Lafontaine blinked.

Once, twice, thrice.

They rubbed their tired eyes, unable to stay focused, but their mind was abuzz from the revelation they just had.

The light from their computer screen glared back at them as they checked the time, and let out a deep yawn.

"Go to bed," Their wife sleepily murmured, rolling over to wrap her arms around them. They smiled lovingly at her, moving their hand so they could easily rub her swollen belly in greeting. "It's late, and the baby wants you to sleep."

"Y'know, the more you use our tiny human as a guilt trip, the more likely I'm going to feel bad about doing the simplest things, Perr," They chuckle.

Perry curiously gazed at the screen, "What're you even looking at?"

"You're not going to believe this," They sigh, pointing to the comment section on the most recent video. It was a comedic drinking game between Danny and Kirsch, and they were trying to best each other on how manlier the other can be. "Laura was only in the background for two seconds, but half the comments are about her."

"Well, she's a very valuable member to the team. Everyone loves her." Perry says fondly. "It's hard to believe she's going to be celebrating her five-year anniversary of working with us soon."

Lafontaine nods slowly, "Her and… Carmilla."

Realization floods across the expecting mother's face, "Oh. Are rumors starting to pour in about those two again?"

"The audience doesn't know that they dated, remember? Just we do. But the comments here are more along the lines of, 'Laura and Carmilla would make such an adorable couple' 'They would make such beautiful babies together' 'The way Carmilla smiles at her when she thinks no one is looking melts my heart' and, my favorite one, 'Sometimes I get so distracted by how beautiful Carmilla is I forget what the video is about', and a follow up comment, 'honestly I think you just read Laura's mind'." Lafontaine sighs, "Look. There's even fan art." They claim, opening a new tab to reveal a DeviantArt page of the two sitting on the grass just outside the main building, Carmilla reading a book with Laura curled up beside her. "They've even made a ship name for them— _Hollstein_ caught on fast." Nonetheless, folks were starved for good sapphic context these days and they'll make something out of nothing; it didn't surprise LaF in the slightest. 

"Do we have a ship name?" Perry asked curiously.

"The fans like to refer us as Laferry," Lafontaine chuckles, and their wife smiles in approval. "Regardless, this has been going on for the last few months. At first I thought it was no big deal, but… our views have been increasing since Carmilla came out of her shell and agreed to do more skits with her co-workers."

"Sweetie, you know why we can't put them in the same room together," Perry sighs tiredly, "It was a horrible situation for them both and even after all this time, I don't think their hearts have completely healed."

Lafontaine was silent. They continue to stare at the screen, "I just want her to be happy. I see the way Laura looks at Carmilla when no one else is. She still misses her."

"I know, love. But it's not in our place to meddle with their relationship. From what I see, Laura has moved on. She's been going on dates."

"With that bombshell? Elsie?" Lafontaine scoffs, folding their arms, "Totally not her type of woman. I don't like the way she treats her—I can't help it if I get overprotective. I've known her longer than that bitch has."

"Hey," Perry soothes, rubbing their arm, "I don't trust her either, but this is what Laura wants, and we can't intrude. Please, let it rest for the night. We'll talk about this civilly in the morning."

"Alright, Perr."

They waited for a moment as Perry snuggled beside them, closing her eyes.

Without hesitation, they sent a quick email to their CEO, Stephanie, knowing she would look at it.

Perry sighs sleepily, "You sent an email, didn't you?"

"Yup."

"The baby is so disappointed in you."

"At this point I regret nothing."

**November 25, 2014**

**7:30 am.**

"G'mornin', boss," Kirsch, everyone's favorite intern, greets Lafontaine at the door. "What's got you all chipper?"

They excitedly rubbed their hands together, "I just got a clear from Steph to start preparing for next Saturday's video. Y'know, December 2nd?"

"Really? That's awesome, bro. I can't wait to watch it. Whenever you work on the skits our videos get way more views. I… I've always wanted to be here because your work inspires me."

"Aw, thanks bud. Keep working hard and you'll get there someday too." They smile, accepting a coffee from him. They loved the holidays. Everyone was happy, the office was decked out in mistletoe and holly, and Christmas-themed videos on YouTube were of high demand. It was a difficult industry, keeping up with the latest trends that seemed to slip away by the hour, what with the apocalypse threatening their views, but Lafontaine loved their job.

They quickly scan the room for the happy ball of sunshine, and their smile widens. Laura was talking animatedly next to a tired-looking Betty, who surely hadn't finished her first cup of coffee yet and last nights' party had ruined her. Though, the two were close friends, and she attempted to follow along with the conversation best she could.

It was hilarious how Laura's cubicle was the most festive; she attempted to cram in every knickknack or ornament possible. Garland hung from her laptop and a bobblehead elf sat beside her laptop.

Betty's chin fell into the coffee cup the moment Laura's attention was diverted from her.

"Hey, frosh," LaF greets, hugging her from behind and placing a gentle kiss on her cheek. She beams at them, leaning into their hug. "How was traffic today?"

"Not bad, only thirty minutes. Which is a miracle during the holiday. I went through the back roads instead of going through 42nd street and Times Square. Passed through every light," she beams, "I love New York at Christmastime." She rambles, shaking her head, "What's up?"

"Finish the article for Snapchat yet?" They wondered, already knowing the answer.

"You know me by now, Laf. I finished that column three days ago. I have it saved, ready to post tomorrow."

"God, you're so good at this," They mumble happily into her hair, and she giggles, "Hey. Mind coming to my office in 5 minutes?"

"Sure!" She exclaims brightly.

They pat her shoulder and walk away, giving a tiny smile to Carmilla who was lounging on the far side of the room, looking disinterested and unaffected by everyone around her. The only soul who was known to be a Grinch during Christmas. Lafontaine felt a tug at their heart. Unfortunately for Carmilla, she wasn't exactly admired among her co-workers. She came off as rude and sarcastic and everyone avoided her like the plague. She had a few friends, like the twins Will and JP from London, but that was about it.

They knew little of Carmilla's past, other than she hit rock bottom after her break up with Laura. No job, no home, no family. She vanished, leaving no trace of her existence in _America_ , until she suddenly came to Lafontaine begging for help three years ago. Tired, hungry, helpless.

She's been living in a small apartment that Perry is the landlord of, and is good with keeping up her rent. But she's sad. Lafontaine knew that emotion well.

"Morning, Elvira," They chirped, and the young woman sighs deeply.

"Don't talk to me unless somebody's dying."

"Sheesh, I'm just saying hello." They shake their head, and notices Carmilla's gaze gently flicker towards Laura, who briskly walked past them. A look of sorrow flashes across her face and she moves deeper into the comfy chair, probably wishing for it to swallow her whole. "You know you can talk to me about anything, right?"

"Whatever, Einstein." She grits out, shoving their hand away. She then glared at the reindeer mug in front of her, "Fuck. I hate _everything_."

Lafontaine throws their hand up in defense, and begrudgingly walks into their office where Laura was waiting.

"So! What's super important that you had to see me personally?" She asked with excitement, bouncing on the couch.

"Oh! Um. Yeah," Lafontaine utters, and now that they were really thinking about it, realized that they were probably about to make a horrible decision. Since their break up, Laura and Carmilla didn't even speak to each other. They haven't had closure. Some couples needed it, others didn't. Putting the two women together after such an event would be catastrophic. Laura was going to hate them if this ended poorly. "Uh. Okay, there isn't an easy way to say this."

There was a quiet moment. Laura's eyes watered, "Am I getting fired?"

"What? Whoa! Why did your mind jump to that! You're not getting fired, relax Laura!" They rushed out, hurrying beside her to grip her shoulders, "No. You're my best friend and honestly one of the best employees we have. Never doubt yourself for a second. I just… I have a new idea for a YouTube video but I'm worried what you'll think about it."

"Okay," She says with a sniff, "What is it?"

"Remember those silly 'I Get Handcuffed With A…' videos we did a while back that got millions of views? How would you feel about being a part of one?" Laura laughed and nods, "Wait, seriously? You wouldn't mind getting handcuffed to someone for 24 hours?"

"It'll be a learning experience for me. You know I'm open to any challenge."

"Right. Well. Um, this time we've decided to do it with exes. Your… your ex."

Laura's eyes glossed over for a moment, as she sighed, her shoulders drooping. "Why? LaF, you know why I can't—,"

"Honestly, Laura? No. I don't know why you can't be civil with her, because you've _barely told me the full story_. All I know is that she abandoned you, because the day Carmilla turned into work for the first day you turned white as a ghost and ran into the bathroom, and you cried. You cried for hours and refused to get out. Don't you know how much that hurt me? Because I'm your best friend and you still, _still,_ don't trust me?"

"I just… I can't do this, Lafontaine. Thinking about what happened makes my heart hurt so much." Tears fell down her face, "Especially during this time of year."

" _Susan Lafontaine_!" Perry burst through the door, a box of Kleenex and brownies in hand. "We talked about this. Why didn't you wait until I was ready? Stop interrogating her."

"I'm not—I wasn't—," They huff, looking weakly at the teary-eyed blonde.

They sigh and take her hand. Perry was already tending to Laura, being the mother hen that she was, wiping her eyes and squeezed her shoulder lovingly.

"You're in a safe place, love. You know you can trust us, right?"

Laura nods mutely, wiping her eyes with her sleeve. "There's… not much to the story. We, um. We dated on and off in college. Carmilla expressed from the beginning that she was… afraid of commitment and didn't get attached easily. So being the naïve nineteen-year-old I was I held on top the hope that she would one day want to settle down. I was pushing her to change. I thought I could. But every time we weren't together, she would… be sleeping around with somehow every girl on campus. We got back together our junior year, stayed together for half a year… and then I popped the question," She utters softly, wiping her eyes. Her voice cracked at the last syllable, "I know we were young then. I had just turned twenty-two and she was twenty-three, but… I just… knew that she was the one for me. I couldn't imagine my life with any other woman. I love— _loved_ her," she knew it was pointless to correct herself, but she did it anyway, "I was ready to have a baby with her and move out into a nice home and be that lesbian couple that has three cats and everyone came to their house for parties. But she just… clearly, she wasn't interested in _any_ of that, and the next morning she left me."

Laura was openly crying now, lying on top of Perry as she finally spilled her soul, "And it hurts so much. Because I should act like I moved on while seeing her every day, and as much as I try to convince myself that I can be happy without her, I'm not."

"I miss her so much, Perry." She hiccups, feeling a weight lifted off her chest. Her heart broken.

"Then why don't you confront her about it? Settle this madness?" Perry asked gently.

"I'm so scared. I don't… I don't want to open a can of worms. Clearly she's moved on from me and all of this is stupid."

Lafontaine slapped their head, "Oh my god, _Laura_. You're so oblivious sometimes it physically hurts me. Look. I have to show you something," they announce, and proceed to show Laura all the comments and fan art of the couple, "Keeping a low profile has never been your strong suit, Hollis."

Laura blushes, swallowing thickly as she watches herself sending gentle gazes towards Carmilla if she's ever on screen, or the way her ex literally skirted out of her way with an anxious huff if she was walking near.

"One day. Twenty-four hours. If this doesn't work, I'll give you a pay raise," Lafontaine says earnestly, and Laura's mouth gapes open, "If it does, make sure I'm best person at your wedding."

"Whoa, LaF!" Laura giggled weakly, as they shut off the laptop and took her hand again.

"Feel free to call me whenever you get overwhelmed, or if something happens. We'll be there. We are not doing this against your will. You have every reason to back out right now."

Laura had a tentative look on her face. Taking a deep breath, and with a reassuring squeeze from Perry, she smiled at her friends. "Okay. I'm okay. I'll do it," She murmured, "It won't be for the views. It'll be for my own sanity. I need closure."

"You have a week to sleep on it, love. Keep your calendar marked for December 1st." Perry adds, and Laura helped her off the couch.

"And don't talk about this to anyone. This'll stay just between us until the video is posted." Lafontaine adds.

Laura smiles at them, pulling them in for another hug, "Thank you for taking care of me."

"Always, kiddo." They grin, giving her nose a kiss. "This'll be a Christmas miracle if it does work."

They broke apart and Laura took another deep breath before turning around. She opened the door to reveal… Carmilla.

Carmilla's face paled and she staggered back, "I. Um, heard crying and I just wanted to check on that person and see if they were okay."

Laura's eyes narrowed, "Oh, so now because it's me you're suddenly disinterested?"

"Listen cupcake, if you're on your lady time it's not my business."

"Fuck you!" She said bitterly, shoving her aside.

"Yeah, been there done that." Carmilla says weakly, hands balling into fists. Laura gasped, tears glistening in her eyes again as she angrily stormed off. Perry chased after her.

"Nice going, Karnstein." Lafontaine mumbled sadly, giving her a dirty look.

"What? What the fuck? Why is it always my fault?" She snaps, shaking her head.

"I—no—Carmilla—,"

"Leave me alone." She growls, and leaves before she could give Lafontaine a chance to explain.

 **December 1** **st** **, 2014**

**10:00 am.**

Carmilla honestly debated showing up to work today. It was a Friday, if she skipped now, she'd have three days free. She wondered what the repercussions would have been if she stayed, buried deep within her nice, comfy bed, forgetting about all her worries.

Away from the disgusting Christmas cheer that seemed to follow her everywhere.

She knew Lafontaine would have her head on a silver platter if she managed to get away with it.

She wasn't sure how she felt about this. Yes, at first, she was only doing this for the good of the company, and to remix an old idea, but… this would be the first time she will be with Laura.

In five years.

After she made the biggest mistake of her life.

This was one of the many reasons why she hated this time of year.

Carmilla sighs, picking nervously at the palm of her hand. This wouldn't be good in the long run for her mental state. She could already feel the energy bubbling within her stomach, threatening to rise, up and up, until her throat humiliated her.

"Do you need anything before we start?" Lafontaine asks gently, placing a hand on her shoulder, "Water?"

"No, I'm fine. Thanks." She mumbles, looking away. "I'm… sorry about last week. It wasn't my place to say anything."

"Carmilla Karnstein, actually apologizing about something for once?" They tease, and she scowls.

"Stop being a dick."

"I don't have one."

Carmilla rolls her eyes and they chuckle, moving over to sit next to their camera woman, Mel. A moment passed until Laura finally came through the door, wearing tight, curvy pants that fit her body and an ugly sweater. Carmilla fought the urge to roll her eyes at the Santa hat placed on Laura's head. This girl went all out for every holiday season, it was annoying.

Gone was the baby face, those round, wondrous eyes, that excited light on her face that was itching to explore the world. She looked older now, more mature than when they first met. She's changed, in many ways, like she had to grow up quicker. The thought made Carmilla's heart ache knowing that she was the cause of it.

"Hey." Laura says gently, and Carmilla gives her a weak smile.

"Hey."

"…you look… different," The young woman murmurs, taking her eyes away. "A good different. Like, you look good. Um. Yeah."

"Gee, thanks." Laura grits out, sitting beside her, but keeping a fair distance. Her perfume was suddenly overwhelming Carmilla as she sucks in a deep breath. Honey. Lavender.

Home.

She's missed the smell of home so much.

"And, action!" Lafontaine calls, giving them a thumb up, "We're rolling!"

"We uh, this may come as a surprise to our audience, but we went to college together," Laura began, giving the camera a nervous smile, "Started dating. Started hooking up. Um. We were on and off for a few years until things just sort of… fizzled out." She rubbed the back of her neck, "We're just two completely different people."

"If we compiled the amount of dates together into one, it was just a really long… four years of my life that I can never take back." Carmilla said boldly, and Laura had a sharp intake of breath. Her hands were still shaking. "If you didn't drool while you slept we probably would have stayed together." She adds with a soft smile, and Laura shoves her aside.

"I do not. Drool!"

"Laura, the number of trips we had to take to the laundromat was pathological."

"I was wearing braces then, are you still going to hold that against me?" Laura grumbles, shaking her head.

"What even… what even happen to us? Why did we break up?" Carmilla wonders, eyeing her ex carefully. Calculating her next move. Crossing dangerous waters.

Laura gave her a tentative stare, "Oh, there was a number of things. We both… wanted different things in life after we graduated college. You were known to be such a player then. Very noncommittal."

"What? No. Stop spreading fake news, cupcake."

"You went out to a gay bar and brought a girl home to our dorm once every other night. Do you know why, my grades were failing so badly that first year? It was because of you, ya dingus!"

Carmilla's cheeks flushed as she turned stare at Lafontaine in exasperation, but they were laughing. Hardly any help.

Laura sighed.

"Are you ready for this?"

"Must I be?"

"Are you going to be miserable and indifferent the whole time?"

"Honey, you know by now there is more to my personality than that. I am made of sarcasm and homosexuality."

Laura choked out a noise of surprise, as she struggled to keep her composure. "Honestly, I think being with you for twenty-four hours like this will just solidify my reasons for hating you."

"Ouch," Carmilla mumbled. Her heart ached.

"I have a date tonight, so I'm definitely not letting you ruin it for me," Laura utters, fumbling with the handcuffs in her hands.

A memory suddenly flashed in Carmilla's mind of Laura, hot and naked underneath her, handcuffed to their bed, moaning her name. She shivered and nervously rubbed her hands against her thighs.

"No promises that I'll be on my best behavior, cutie." She said weakly.

Laura glares at her, and proceeds to put one cuff on Carmilla's right wrist, "Whoa, what the hell? I am right-handed! You can't do that!" She growls, and turns to the camera, "You see. You see, this is one of the biggest issues. She's so controlling."

"Um. I teach a yoga class in an hour and I need my dominant hand."

"Oh, no. Am I suddenly in Laura's World now? Where everything must be about her? Do you think I'm just going to follow blindly along, like a lost, lovesick puppy—," the handcuff closed in on her skin with a soft click. "Fuck. _Me_."

"Take me out to dinner first." Laura snaps, cheeks flushing red for all sorts of reasons. Composing herself, she closed in the handcuff on her left wrist and nods to the camera, "And the twenty-four hours start… right now."

**11:00 am.**

The first hour was hard. Carmilla and Laura didn't speak to each other, as they both pretended the other didn't exist. That nothing out of place was happening. Carmilla was suddenly hyper aware of her environment, as she could feel Laura's heart beat considerably, and stared at the way her throat bobbed when she swallowed. Her hand desperately ached to grasp Laura's, to revel for at least a second at how soft they were.

She felt a lump in her throat as she noticed everyone snickering at them in the office, and she felt so out of place. Laura talked with them all as if nothing was amiss.

The car ride to Laura's gym was the longest twenty minutes of her life.

The yoga class? Unbearable.

Carmilla tried not to stare at Laura's toned abs, the six-pack that the tiny cupcake somehow managed to get over the last five years. When they were together, she had the most adorable bulge that would pucker out of her jeans, and Laura would always feel self-conscious of her weight. Carmilla would remind her every day that she was beautiful. It was nice to see that she was finally growing into loving her body.

She also tried not to stare at the way the leggings she wore showed off her perfect ass either.

Ah. Fuck. Carmilla _really_ hoped no one saw the slight wet stain that was forming in between her thighs.

"Alright, hello everyone. Um. Don't ask questions about the current situation I'm in and we won't have a problem," Laura began, crossing her legs, "We're going to start off our work out in this seating position."

Carmilla couldn't concentrate. Laura had her eyes closed, breathing in slowly. She didn't know where else to look but at the way her chest moved up and down. She was certain Laura had caught her staring, because after five minutes, a satisfied smirk appeared on her lips and she was biting her lip.

Laura knows the lip bite kills her every time.

She gets up to walk around the room and check on everyone, but Carmilla is stuck in a trance.

"Nice and easy. There we go. Fix your foot to the right position there." Laura chimes, pressing down on the woman's back.

She hated this. She fucking hated this. She hated being so close to the girl she was in love with and not being able to touch her.

"What if I assist that cute brunette and you assist the old lady over there?" Carmilla says with a snark, pretending to eye the tall women seductively.

Laura sighs deeply, "You are not a certified yoga instructor. You can't do that. I could get in trouble." She growls, "I am going to seriously kill you."

"Alright—deep breath in. Release your hands behind your back," They were only an hour into this stupid day and Carmilla was done. She just lay on the floor, left hand grasping her head. "What're you doing? Idiot, get up."

"I can't do this anymore, Laura. I hurt everywhere."

"H-how the fuck are you hurting? You've barely done any stretches!"

"I'm in hell. Lau, how much longer?" She whimpered, letting the old nickname out before she could stop herself.

"W-we're almost done," The yoga instructor sighs, nudging her shoulder, "I'll treat you to a protein shake after this for surviving."

"I want a cheeseburger."

"Gross, no! You can't have fatty foods after you work out you'll get a stomach ache."

"Ugghnnnn,"

"You are literally behaving like a child. Girl the hell up."

Carmilla closed her eyes and mentally wished for someone to stake her.

**1:00 pm.**

They had lunch at a quick healthy food place and then went to _Central Park_ to work out some more, much to Carmilla's dismay. She was amazed at how much of a health nut Laura turned into. She excitedly rambled on about her trainer and long-term friend, Danny, who Carmilla became jealous of just by the way of mentioning her it had light a spark in Laura's eyes and a smile on her face.

 _She replaced me,_ Carmilla thought with a frown, as she nervously gazed at the crowd of people blurring past her. Some stared in shock at the handcuffs, while others paid them no mind.

Fuck, _it was so cold_. She forgot to wear her leather jacket today.

Carmilla felt her chest begin to hurt as she tried to keep herself composed, but the emotions she was holding in since that morning was threatening to bubble out. Everything was sore. Her heart hurt so much.

There were so many things that threatened to spill out of Carmilla's lips.

 _I'm sorry,_ was one of them.

 _I love you,_ was another.

She jerked her left hand back forcibly so Laura could stop running, and the tiny creampuff turned to yell at her.

"What the hell are you—," Carmilla reared to her left, clutching her stomach as she dumped the contents of her sandwich that hadn't sit well with her. "Oh my god, Carm," She mumbled softly, reaching over to rub her back, "When you were complaining earlier, I thought you were just joking. I hadn't realized you were physically in pain. I'm… I'm sorry. I'm so sorry I should've gone back to check on you."

Carmilla hacked, slouching over as she let a tear fall down her cheek.

"Carm," Laura worried, catching the tear as it fell, "Please. Talk to me. You've been quiet this whole time. Don't think I haven't noticed."

Carmilla shook her head, swallowing thickly again as she tried to conceal her emotions. Obviously, that didn't go well in her favor as she suddenly felt her heart beat pick up at an abnormal speed, and her vision start to blur. She wobbled once. Twice. Laura's eyes widened as she already knew how to take care of Carmilla when she had her panic attacks. They quickly made their way to the closest bench, Laura forcing Carmilla to lay down on her back while Laura rubbed her head with both of her hands. Carmilla wrapped her arm around Laura's waist, hiding her face on her stomach as she sobbed quietly.

"I'm sorry," Carmilla mumbled, unable to look at her, "I'm so sorry. I'm really sorry."

"It's my fault, Carm. I didn't… I held my pride and I didn't think to check on you," Laura sighs, running her fingers through Carmilla's hair, "I'm sorry."

 _Not for that,_ Carmilla wanted to say, her chest hurting, _for leaving you. For abandoning you when you needed me most. I was so ashamed with turning you down that I couldn't face you again. Being away from you only made the situation worse and I hate myself every day for leaving. Because if we had stayed together, we could have had a house by now. A family. A cat, a little girl that looks like you and me…_ Carmilla swallowed and shut her eyes again, _But I threw that all away the moment I said no. Like a fucking idiot. And now you've moved on from me._

They held each other for a long moment, Carmilla calming down after taking a few large gulps of water, and cuddled on the cold bench. Something changed between them, as if Laura had heard her unspoken prayer, and she was a lot gentler with her touch.

"Please edit that out of the video," Carmilla mumbled softly, still leaning into her embrace.

"Of course, Carm. I may… dislike you but I'm not a monster."

"At least that's an upgrade from wishing I was in hell and wanting to piss on my grave when I die," She says, smiling tiredly at her.

"I never said those cruel things to you, Carm."

"You were definitely thinking them when we…" she sighs, closing her eyes, "When I… left…"

A beat of silence passed between them. "Do you miss me?"

"Like someone cut a hole in me." Laura replied weakly, "I-I know that this… situation isn't ideal, but… and I know there's still a whole lot of shit we need to talk about… but I never realized how much I missed you until now. Just being here with you… I feel so…"

"…young again?" Carmilla finished, giving her a gentle smile, "You've changed so much, leibling."

"You did too." Laura smiles. The tiny blonde then caressed her fingers on Carmilla's face and Carmilla reveled in her touch. "Feel better?" A nod. "Do you want to talk about it?" Carmilla shook her head no. "Okay."

And she didn't ask.

**6:30 pm.**

As the day wore on, Carmilla slowly fell back into step with Laura. Her touches became gentler, more cautious. It was almost as if they were back to those first few weeks, back when they first started dating and everything was bliss.

Carmilla noticed lots of things. When Laura would bump into her she'd blush and do that adorable notion where she gives Carmilla a soft smile and tucks her hair between her ears. Or when she laughed it lit up her entire face and her eyes practically sparkled. Or how soft her hands felt when she finally pressed them together, and Carmilla had to blink back tears because each one fit perfectly into hers.

They spent the afternoon shopping, sharing stories about how the last five years went. It was a much better exchange than earlier that morning, when they were angry and bitter towards one another. But an elephant still hung in the air between them, threatening to suffocate Carmilla.

Carmilla took a deep breath at her old home. She was amazed that Laura kept the apartment, even with all the memories they had. She could picture everything in perfect detail.

As she stepped in holding the camera, something soft and warm brushed against her leg. "…Cheeseball?" She gaped in shock, picking the orange colored cat in her arms, "This crazy animal is still alive?" She played with the tiny Elf hat placed in between his ears.

Laura laughed tearfully, petting her cat, "I'm surprised too. He's going to be turning nine soon."

 _Nine years old._ When they found him, he was only a kitten, and they rescued him from an old rusty box someone left on the street. It was a great bonding experience for both girls as they cleaned all the dirt and muck off him that night. They had to hide the kitten from the dean whenever inspections came in and they could keep him in their dorm. When they separated, Laura couldn't bear to get rid of him.

"You're an old man, Cheese," Carmilla chuckled, as the cat rubbed its head on her breast. "Did you take good care of mommy? I'm sure you did. You've always been a good cat."

"Carm…" Laura said gently, tears glistening in her eyes.

"I, uh. Oh," She realized her mistake, "I'm sorry. That slipped out." She sighs, hiding her face in Cheese's fur. She tried not to look at the Christmas tree beside her. Or how barren the walls looked now that their photos were all gone. Or the lack of mistletoe in the hallway.

This was... this was her home, she felt the memories come over her without warning, but it wasn't the same. It was as if she stepped into a parallel universe where she never existed here. It weighed heavy on her soul.

"Don't apologize. It just brought back a good memory." Laura reassures her, and nods to the camera, "C'mon. Let's make dinner before we head out."

 _Ugh, right._ Carmilla thought, a sour taste in her mouth, _she's going on a date with some bombshell._

The young woman tried not to have that put a damper on her mood, since she knew Laura would be able to tell when she's upset. So, Carmilla fell into her little world of pretend again. Where they were in love. A paradise of kisses, cuddles, and lazy mornings. Where they were making a quick dinner before going out on a date to a cheap bar. Cheeseball would be in the middle of everything, poking his head into the food, all the while making cute noises and rubbing his head on Carmilla's arm.

In that one, blissful hour, they were a family again.

Carmilla was home.

At least, until the crashing reality hit Carmilla as Laura changed into a gorgeous sparkling dress that fit her so well, and her face was coated with an unhealthy amount of make-up. Carmilla's heart clenched as she looked over Laura's shoulder at the texts Elsie sent her, which consisted of all capital letters and an annoying amount of emojis. Ugh—she really hated those stupid things. Why the fuck was there a movie made about them?

"Carm, is that all you're wearing?" She came back to reality, blinking twice before staring at Laura's pretty face.

"What's wrong with it?" She grumbles, a lump in her throat.

"What's _wrong_ with it? You're wearing Birkenstocks, ripped jeans, and a black tank top. It's not very becoming on you."

"I'm not dressing up to go on a date with you and your mistress, cupcake." She weakly managed, giving her a glare, "There's nobody I need to impress."

A look of hurt flashes across Laura's eyes, "Please. Don't be difficult. Don't make this harder than it already is."

"Oh, _I'm_ being difficult? That's rich, coming from you. You're the one who was so gung ho about this stupid idea."

"That was before I remembered I have my dates with Elsie on _Fridays_! It's not like I can cancel it last minute. Look, I know you hate going out to clubs. Just ignore me while we're there, get yourself drunk, and hit on some unfortunate girl without a brain and we can forget that this whole night ever happened."

Carmilla bit her lip, and with all sense of reason gone for a second, she grabbed Laura's shoulders and pinned her against the wall. In a low, husky voice she asked, "What if I don't feel like sharing you right now?"

"…What."

"Please," she begs, gently placing a trail of kisses up Laura's neck. Her hands traced the outline of Laura's lips; every fiber of her being was aching to taste her, to revel in her love.

Her home.

There were so many things threatening to tumble out of Carmilla's lips again.

_I'm sorry._

_I missed you._

_I'm in love with you._

Instead, she settled on, "Don't go."

Laura sucked in a deep breath, as she looked to be at war with herself.

"Carmilla," Her name came out as a garbled plea, and that's all it took.

 _Fuck it,_ the young woman decided, and pulled Laura in for a languid kiss. It was familiar and unfamiliar at the same time. Noses bumped. Their lips fumbled to greet each other, but they found their place. God, how she missed the taste of home. The way Laura's tongue danced in her mouth, the way Laura's hand moved to gently caress her cheek… all of it. She loved all of it.

She loved how strong and loudly Laura's heart beat for her.

She didn't want to pull away.

She suddenly tasted tears.

Laura was crying.

"I can't," she hiccups, hiding her face. "I can't do this. I can't open my heart to you again."

"L-Laura—," Carmilla tried to reach out.

"Don't. Touch. Me." She exclaims, doing that thing where she holds her arms and makes herself smaller.

The seconds that passed by were painful.

Her cellphone rang. It was Elsie. Laura composed herself quickly, _too quickly,_ and plastered on a fake smile. "Hey. Yeah, I'm on my way. Are you already there?" Each word was like a knife was getting pushed into her heart. "Good. I missed you all week. I can't wait to see you. Okay. Bye."

Carmilla swallowed thickly, tears glistening in her eyes. She thought she had wasted them all on Laura Hollis. Turns out even now, after building up walls around her heart, this bitch can still shatter it into pieces all over again.

**10:45 pm.**

Carmilla wasn't sure how many shots she drank, all she knows was that it wasn't helping her heart at all. It still ached, beating her down and ruining whatever sense of dignity she had left.

She hated December.

She hated how she heard the same fucking song over and over again.

She hated how happy everyone was.

She hated how cold the weather became.

She hated Elsie. The way the other woman touched Laura, kissed her, laughed with her, none of it felt right. Sure, Elsie probably had good intentions with her love, but she was already on the shit list with Carmilla. Laura deserves better.

_Oh, like you?_

The evil voice said in her mind, as Carmilla took another long sip of her drink.

_The girl who refused to marry her, taking her heart and shattering it? All because she was SCARED? Grow up. You missed your chance. Stop pining over something that's lost. She doesn't love you._

Discreetly wiping away the tears on her face, she pulled out her phone and sent a text to Lafontaine.

**Carm: I quit.**

Lafontaine responded immediately.

**Brainiac: Wait, what the hell? You can't quit.**

**Carm: I can and I will. After today. I'm fucking done. I can't stand this anymore.**

**Brainiac: Carmilla, what's going on? Are you drunk? Are you okay?**

**Carm: No, clearly, I'm not fucking okay. The love of my life has moved on and is on a date with some beach bombshell. I can't… show up to work anymore knowing that she doesn't love me back.**

**Brainiac: Carmilla, you must talk things out with her. You can't just make a spur of the moment decision based on what you see. Please. Don't make any rash decisions. Perry is shaking her head and says that communication is always important in any relationship. I'm tired of this insipid relationship drama. FIGURE. IT. OUT.**

Carmilla sighs, shutting off her phone and turning to the bar tender, checking her out. She's cute. Dark skinned, curly hair, and she wore a golden dress that fit her nicely. She then sighed when she noticed the ring on her finger. And taken, someone already claimed this beauty.

"Alright, I'm cutting you off." The woman chuckled, taking away her glass.

"Noooo, c'mon. I was just starting to feel the buzz."

"With the amount of glasses in front of you, you're already feeling it, sugar," she then nods to Laura, "Alright. The night has been boring so far and I need the gossip. What's the deal?"

"Do you always impart your wisdom upon pretty girls?" Carmilla drawls, resting her hand against her face.

"Only the ones who are in distress," she winks, "Now, spill."

Carmilla sighs, grateful that the music was loud and Laura was distracted by Elsie. Why did everything hurt?

"To make a long story short, we dated on and off in college for four years and when we graduated she wanted to marry me. I wasn't ready. I was a fool and left her. I didn't realize how much I loved her until she was gone."

The woman gave her a look, "Did you tell her that yet?"

"No."

"Well, what're you waiting for?"

" _That's_ you bartender advice?"

"I never said I was an expert," she snickers, and nods to Laura, "Go for it." She then leans into Carmilla, "I've been watching those two all night. Your soulmate looks so beside herself. Swoop in and save her."

_Soulmate._

Carmilla bits her lip tentatively as she leans into Laura, wanting nothing more than to kiss those lips again. To touch her.

"—and then I said to this fucking rude-ass dude, 'the next time you ask for a hamburger again I'm going to shove it down your pants'!" Laura let out a laugh. It was a weak one, and there was a falter to her tone.

"Charming. I'm sure he really saw the goodness in your soul right then." Carmilla grumbled. "Tis the fucking season."

"Rude. I didn't ask for your opinion."

"Nor did I ask for your existence, or to meet you, but here we are."

" _Carmilla_ ," Laura says in a warning tone.

But Carmilla wasn't done. "And by the way, that wardrobe combination you're wearing tonight is so last season. It looks fucking ridiculous on you. Who are you trying to impress, the _IT_ clown?"

Laura fought back a snort. She covered her face with her hand. "Oh my god…"

"Laura," Carmilla tried again. Not cupcake or cutie or creampuff. "Please. Can we talk? Alone?"

"Right. Talking would be… talking would be good," she then turns to Elsie, who looked offended still, "Just give us a second."

Carmilla's heart was beating like a hammer as they pushed through the crowded bar, into the non-conforming bathroom. She didn't even have time to breathe as Laura rounded on her, eyes furious and desperate.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? You were so rude to her!"

Whoa. Okay. "Me? I was just pointing out her fashion sense. Honestly, how can you even bear going out on the town with her dressed like that?"

"Look who's talking," Laura grumbled, and did some ridiculous Laura-like notions with her hands, "Ugh! This has been the most frustrating, most ludicrous day of my life!"

"Oh. Gee I wonder why. It can't possibly be because we're handcuffed together for some stupid Buzzfeed video." She said, sarcasm dripping from her lips.

"And you're not making this any better. Because all you're doing is just bitching and moaning about _everything_ ," She then proceeds to mock Carmilla, " _Ew, I don't like working out I've never lifted anything in my life. Ugh, cupcake, even breathing is so difficult sometimes_. You are the literal definition of an angsty teenager that just listens to MCR all fucking day."

"Do you want to do this right now? Just hash out everything that we hate about each other in a stinky fucking bathroom? Fine. I'll bite. You haven't fucking changed."

"What the hell, Carm! I'm a realist now!"

"Oh, really. A 'realist'? You're just lying to yourself about that."

"Well it's better than being a—,"

"A _what_?"

Laura's bunched up face was so cute, "Smug."

"Hypocritical,"

"Superior."

"Delusional."

"Condescending,"

"Tightly-wound—,"

"Narcissistic."

Carmilla could feel Laura's breath against her skin, and suddenly she was leaning in.

So close.

"Prissy."

"Uncaring!"

Closer.

"Nerdy—,"

"Nihilistic little—,"

_Closer._

"—really fucking hot," Carmilla managed to gasp, before their lips crashed together. No time to think. Just feel.

They kissed again. And again. Until they ran out of air and Laura's grip around Carmilla's tank top tightened.

They broke apart, staring into each other's eyes for a long moment. She tried to read Larua's face, but it was overwhelmed with emotion, as tears glistened in them and her lips curled into a happy smile. She then gives Carmilla one gentle, affirmative nod, and she moves in for another passionate kiss.

The bathroom door burst open to reveal Elsie, "…oh. L-Laura?"

"Oh my god, Elsie," she gasped, pulling away from Carmilla for a moment, "I can explain this."

"Save your breath. Clearly, you still have some unresolved feelings for your trashy ex that ruined you, threw you out into the curb and manipulated you for four years," She sighs, "I should have known. You were never happy with me."

"No, Elsie, this is just a stupid challenge for my job, and we were having a moment but I swear—,"

"I'm _done_ , Laura."

"Elsie, please—,"

"Don't talk to me ever again."

Something inside Carmilla snapped. Letting out a low growl, she stormed over to the broken-hearted girl, grabbing her by the collar, "Listen here, bitch. I don't know you, and you don't know me. But next time, don't make assumptions on a story you only heard that was one-sided. Because five years ago I walked out on the most beautiful, amazing girl that changed my life and it was all since I thought I wasn't worthy enough of her love. But now I see that the only one of us who isn't worthy is you. So, take back what you said to her and get the fuck out."

"I swear, if you hurt her—,"

"I am not going to make that same mistake again."

They all stared at each other in calculated silence, before Elsie took a step towards the door. "Goodbye, Laura."

The young woman couldn't say anything in return. She held onto Carmilla as if she were a lifejacket, hiding her face from the camera.

**December 2** **nd** **, 2014**

**12:20 am.**

They stumbled home, emotionally and physically worn out from the day's events. The car ride in the Uber was awkward at best. Laura was silently sobbing all the way home, completely overwhelmed with what just transpired. Carmilla could do nothing, Laura wouldn't let her touch her. Laura still wasn't saying anything to her as she dragged them to the bathroom, and Carmilla felt helpless.

She struggled to get out of her dress and silently begged Carmilla to help her after a few strained whimpers. It was when Laura curled herself up into a ball in the tub, with the water beating down on her back, that she finally allowed herself to cry.

Carmilla refused to sit there and watch. Taking a deep breath, she stripped of her own clothes and shut off the camera so they could have a private moment to themselves.

"Shh, cupcake. Take it easy. Everything's okay. Everything's alright," she soothes, holding onto her head as it rests on her chest. "I'm here. I've got you."

"You son of a bitch," Laura whimpered, "You can't just do that. Waltz back into my life like nothing happened, try to take my heart again only to rip it to pieces. Because right now, I really hope that this means you're going to change. You kiss me and it… it cracks me open and all my stupid hopes come tumbling out in maybes and somedays and how is that fair?"

"Who the hell cares about fair?"

"I _do_ ," Laura exclaimed, wiping her eyes, "You left me, Carmilla. Because you were a coward. You somehow convinced yourself that you are this monster incapable of loving anything. That my feelings for you were false and was just a figment of your imagination. Carmilla, I wanted to marry you. I saw past your flaws and your failures and you completed my heart in a way no one else's would. I knew you were the one for me because my heart raced every time I saw you and my toes curled up in delight. No matter how hard I tried to stop my heart from falling for you it wouldn't let go," she said, her voice breaking, "And suddenly I imagined myself in a white dress walking down the aisle and years later a little bundle of joy in your arms. I held onto that thinking that things would get better. Thinking that I could fix your heart after it's been broken so many times. But being away from you I guess I never realized how much of a toll that took on me."

Carmilla held her as she cried, peppering her face with gentle kisses, catching each tear as it fell. She lets out a deep sigh, "You are right to call me a coward. A fool. A bastard for leaving you. I didn't realize that you were the greatest thing to ever happen to me until the first night without you. I had these demons in my brain that led me to believe I was not deserving of your love. I used hopelessness as an excuse I used for all the awful things that I did. I was suffering, too lost into my own sorrow to not even realize someone was trying to save me. My biggest regret is that I… I never truly listened to you when you tried to rescue me from my pit of despair. I realize now that depression may be something that's a part of me but I can't let it control my every whim. I can't let my anxiety hinder me from all the good things I deserve in this world. There were days where I remember being unable to get out of bed, and refused to let you in and that wasn't fair,"

She bites her lip and places a hand over Laura's heart, "I know it'll take a lot more than sorry to fix us. And you have every right to continue hating me until our last breath. But I just want to let you know that suffering with depression was nothing compared to the nights I spent without you by my side. Those nights I was in _hell_ ," she weakly managed, and now the tears were strolling down her cheeks.

"I was in hell because I let myself go, I forced myself to believe that no one loved me, cared for me. That I was undeserving of receiving love and giving it. I let myself believe that even though I loved you I was incapable of changing who I was, but… little did I knew your soul had already left its mark on mine," she let out a bewildered laugh, resting their foreheads together, "You were the only person in my life who didn't force me to change into the person I wasn't meant to be."

"Because you already are perfect." Laura expressed, tears streaming down her face.

"I understand now that dwelling on the past prohibited me from having a future. I let myself believe that everything was hopeless and I was undeserving of one. So, for the rest of my life I will focus on the present, feeling blessed that you are in my life now, because you are the future that I look forward to," she chuckled weakly, taking a deep breath and holding Laura's hands in hers, "I know apologies are not enough. I know there's still so much more we need to discuss, memories that we need to shift through, and our hearts need time to heal. I don't know about you but I can't imagine my life now without you in it. I don't have a ring, a-and I know this is a really unorthodox way of asking, but…"

"Marry me," Laura says gently, cupping Carmilla's face, "I've spent five lonely years wondering where you were. I don't want to spend another alone. I love you, Carmilla Karnstein. You're the only woman in this life that I want to spend the rest of it with."

"I'll walk through the pits of hell a thousand times if it meant I get a future with you," Carmilla breathed, and finally closed the gap in between them. "Gods, Laura. Yes," she kisses her, "A thousand times," kiss, "Yes." Another kiss, "I love you," Kiss, "I love you," Carmilla wipes away Laura's tears with her thumb and kisses her again, "I love you."

"Show me how much you love me, baby." Laura weakly managed, writhing under her touch. "I've missed the way your body feels being inside mine."

"With pleasure, cupcake."

Carmilla was grateful she turned off the camera for this. Lafontaine would've hated her if she kept it on.

**8:30 am.**

Laura's inner body clock somehow forced her to wake up, even though she had a pounding headache the following morning. The events of last night and the wild day before them came back through bits and flashes, and she fell backwards onto her bed.

The challenge.

Carmilla.

Fighting.

Kissing.

Talking.

The handcuffs.

Laura quickly checked to make sure they were still on, and surprisingly enough they still were. She winced as she rubbed the redness on her wrist, knowing full well that Perry would freak out and treat it right away.

She then looked down, her cheeks flushing. Oh. Right. She's naked now. That's fun.

She then smiled at Carmilla, who was still asleep like the dead. It was nice to see that even after all these years, Carmilla's refusal to be a morning person was still very reminiscent of being a vampire.

Gods, how she missed her.

Christmases were the worst. Their last, big break-up was the week before Christmas Eve, when Carmilla walked out on her. The first year was hard; she spent the whole month in her room, the lights off, curtains drawn, heart shattered. Lafontaine had to get a plane ticket so her father could come all the way from Canada to comfort Laura, since she cut herself off from everyone.

She never realized the severity of her loneliness until now. This gal had somehow made her heart grow three sizes, then break it, patch it up, and wrap it in a nice little bow all at once. She knew not everything is going to be solved overnight.

They have so much to work on together.

Her father, as overprotective as he is, would so not approve.

But she couldn't worry so much about the future.

They had this moment to cherish.

She snuggled up to Carmilla, wrapping her arms around her neck and not hesitating to kiss those perfect lips. Carmilla kissed her back instantaneously, her eyes refusing to open.

"I know you're awake." She giggled, caressing Carmilla's face.

Her fiancée— _fiancée, wow_ —smirked and continued to kiss her, taking her left hand and cupping her breasts.

Laura moaned.

"It's time to get up and make breakfast, baby. Aren't you hungry?"

"Oh, I definitely am. I'm so hungry I could just eat. You. Alive," Carmilla husks, and Holy Hufflepuff, Laura forgot how sexy Carmilla's 'I-Just-Woke-Up' voice sounded.

"Wow, if possible, you've gotten even hornier than before."

"There's just… something about you."

"Maybe it's my keen fashion sense?"

Carmilla and Laura stared at each other for a moment, and then they burst out laughing.

"No. It's definitely not that," Carmilla smiles, resting their foreheads together, "I missed you."

"I missed you, too."

"Hey. Hey, Laura."

"Yes?" She drawled, unable to fight the smile that was spreading across her face.

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

Carmilla bites her lip and suddenly tears glisten in her eyes. Laura reaches out to catch one. "Carmilla!"

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. This is all just… so overwhelming and happy at the same time I just… forgive me, my emotions are a bit of a mess right now."

"You're already forgiven, love."

Carmilla then jumps on top of her and grasps her shoulders, "I can't wait to call you my wife. Can we please just elope tomorrow?"

"Carm," Laura says with a bewildered laugh, "We have work and priorities to focus on. We can't just jump into married life moments after getting together. We should get used to working as a team again. I can't wait to experience that journey with you."

"And how about after, we start trying for a baby?" Her eyes light up, "Oh! Or we can adopt."

Laura's smile became even wider, "How many would you like?"

"Hmm. Two. A mini-me and a mini-you," Carmilla said gently, rubbing noses with her, "Gender doesn't matter. Just a happy, healthy baby is fine."

"Christ, why didn't you open up with that? Screw going to work. I want to get married to you _now_ ," she laughs, tears glistening in her eyes, "You're carrying the first one. Then we're adopting the second."

"Do you honestly think a baby can pop out of this body?"

"What? Oh, come on. You'd look so hot with a baby bump."

Carmilla tilts her head at her, a bewildered smile on her face, "We've only been together for three hours and we're already talking about babies."

"I don't want to wait another five years, Carm," Laura said shyly, poking at her stomach, "I honestly think having a baby would bring us together even more. Or a little one we'd rescue from an adoption center."

Her fiancée gave her a pleasant kiss, "One day at a time, leibling. By this day next year, we'll have a little bundle of joy together."

"Pinky promise?"

Carmilla laughed. It was such a beautiful sound. "Really?"

"Hey, no one ever breaks a pinky promise. They're serious." She pouts.

So. _Adorable_.

"Fine. I promise." They held each other and Laura buried her face in Carmilla's neck, loving the way her hands caressed her hair. "There's a lot we need to work on before we talk about marriage or kids, though." Carmilla mumbled softly, giving her forehead a gentle kiss. "Our problems will never be solved overnight."

"Rome wasn't built in a day," Laura agreed, "...we should start going to couple's therapy. Discuss there what are triggers or worries are. And learn to heal together. I'm in this for the long haul as long as you are."

A happy smile tugged at Carmilla's lips, "I think I'd like that very much."

They both let out relieved sighs, as Carmilla peppered loving kisses all over Laura's face. She giggled in return, admiring how playful she's becoming, and heard the familiar tune of _Let It Snow_ escape both of their lips.

Neither gal wanted to get up, but Laura's ring tone begged them to get ready for work for the day.

"Five more minutes." Carmilla grumbled, snuggling closer to Laura.

"Nope. Not giving into your seduction eyes. We're already late. Get up."

"Nooooooooo."

**December 2** **nd** **, 2014**

**10:00 am.**

Laura pulled into the parking lot nervously, holding Carmilla's free hand in hers.

This was a change.

A welcome change.

"Hey." Carmilla eased softly, bringing her hand to caress Laura's face, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. No. Totally. I just, I see these people every day so it's not like I should be nervous or anything but my heart is racing and I feel like I am about to bring my girlfriend to my dad for permission to marry her, oh my god we didn't do that. My dad is going to kill me. I totally didn't think this through," she started to ramble, "And we're planning to have a baby soon, so that's another load of stress I don't think I will know how to handle. I mean sure, I'm twenty-seven now and you're twenty-eight but that doesn't mean we're wise to the ways of the world. I'm still living in my cheap ass apartment I've had for the last five years. Wait, is that going to be big enough for a baby? Would we need to move? I still borrow money from my dad. I don't even have my own life insurance. Oh my god, Carm—do—," Carmilla abruptly kissed her, silencing whatever rant Laura was about to go on next.

It was passionate, languid, and Laura could practically feel Carmilla's own heart racing. Sparks. Sparks were flying _everywhere_.

She pulled back, giving her a kind smile and rubbing their noses together, "Cupcake. Take a deep breath with me, please." Nodding weakly, Laura did, holding onto Carmilla, "These guys? I don't care what they think about us. I don't care much for their bullshit. Let them think what they want. All that matters is how we feel. And I know that my feelings for you are pure and good and they'll last god willing for the next sixty years. And I'll make sure that I'll spend every day making up for the last five years of leaving you behind. All those other worries you have about telling your dad and figuring out where to live or getting insurance can come later. I'm going to make all the little things so important to us. I'll—um—give you breakfast in bed some mornings with peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, no crust just the way you like it. I know how you like your hot coca in your blue TARDIS mug with five marshmallows placed in an exact order. I also know that you binge _Buffy the Vampire Slayer_ on weekends even though you've seen it for the umpteenth time. I'll bake a batch of cookies with you on nights when you feel overwhelmed because baking helps you destress, even though we actually never end up baking since you just eat the cookie dough," She places their foreheads together, "I'll do all of this, and more, because no matter what life throws at us, being with you is going to be worth fighting for."

"Carmilla!" Laura exclaimed, overwhelmed with her declaration. She pulled her fiancée into a heartwarming, tearful kiss.

Suddenly, there was a loud honk in front of them. They startled and broke apart, not surprised to see Lafontaine glaring at them. A few of their co-workers were behind them, snickering and holding their phones up.

"Oh, crap." Laura moaned, resting her head on Carmilla's shoulder.

"Are you two serious? C'mon, we were supposed to wrap this video up an hour ago! You missed the deadline!"

Carmilla turned to her with a smirk, "Let's give them a show, cupcake."

Laura giggled and nods as they proceed to take a longer time getting out of Laura's car, being extra gross and cuddly just to piss off Lafontaine. Carmilla slowly put on her sunglasses even though it was cloudy outside. And...

She squinted. A tiny snowflake fell on her nose. Laura was beaming.

"Well, it's nice to see that you two are still alive after a full twenty-four hours together. Relationship status?"

"I fucking hate you." Laura grumbles, giving Carmilla a playful side eye.

"You're the actual worst."

They boldly kiss each other. Right in front of their boss, right in front of the entire office. Their co-workers erupted in cheers.

"Hah! _Gay_!" Kirsch blurts out with a laugh, and Danny smacks him across the head.

"They're lesbians, _Harold_." She shoves him aside, cueing everyone in knowing laughter.

Perry came up to them with a happy smile, giving them a hug. "We were both so worried about you. Oh, your wrists are so red. C'mon, let's start the rest of the video so I could heal you right away."

Laura let out a sigh of sweet relief as the key clicked those handcuffs off, and went in immediately to properly kiss Carmilla. Carmilla snickers, wrapping her arms tightly around Laura's neck and peppering her face with kisses.

"Guys, come on! Focus!" Lafontaine grumbles.

Mel snickers, "You're the one who wanted this to happen."

"I wasn't expecting them to be so fucking gross!"

"So, in conclusion. Uh. Don't try this at home kids. Getting handcuffed to your ex doesn't exactly… work out for some. Like a one in a one thousandth chance." Carmilla chuckled, gently rubbing the redness on Laura's wrist with soothing oil. "I learned a lot today."

"Yeah. It just goes to show that dwelling over what happened in the past is no way to live your life. I spent so many years wasted when I could have enjoyed my life. Going to new places. Exploring the world. And in a strange, weird way, this helped. This helped me jump out of my comfort zone and I did things with Carmilla in these last twenty-four hours that we've never done in our whole relationship."

"You know you've made it when you have someone wipe your nose for you," Carmilla laughs, smiling at the camera.

"Yeah! We were making dinner and Carm was cutting onions. I thought she was thinking about like, somebody dying but it was just the onions. I had to…keep having to Kleenex you…" She said, making a hand notion towards her nose.

"I missed you, creampuff. I can't wait to start the rest of my life with you."

"I can't wait to marry you and call you my wife."

"Neither can I,"

"Whoa, whoa, _what_?" Lafontaine blurts out. They hold onto Mel as they almost fall over in shock.

Mel laughs, "Wow. You guys have only been together for how many hours and you're already thinking about marriage?"

"And babies!" Laura chimes happily, poking Carmilla's stomach.

"Damn. What they say about U-Hall lesbians are true. I seriously need to get laid."

"That's an unnecessary comment, Mel."

"You're an unnecessary comment."

"That doesn't even _make sense_!"

Perry let out a chuckle and walked into frame, "That's all for now, folks. Until next time. Please click the subscribe button and click for new videos every Monday and Thursday."

Laura let out a sigh of relief as the camera turned off, and she pulled Carmilla into a hug. "For what it's worth, Laura. I'm glad we went through what we did. I don't think I've ever loved you so much before. It's a little overwhelming."

"We'll help each other through it. I have faith in us. Do you?"

"I do."

"I love you."

"I never stopped loving you, cupcake. Not for a second." Carmilla assures, and pulls Laura in for a loving, affirming kiss.

Later that evening, when Laura and Carmilla were cuddled on their couch in a warm blanket with the fireplace going, and soft Christmas music on repeat, Carmilla curiously checked how many views the video had. Her eyes widened when the numbers read 1.4M.

She shook her head and chuckled. Lafontaine was going to have a field day when they read the comment section tomorrow. Yawning, Carmilla shut off her laptop and moved it onto the coffee table so Laura's head could lay on her lap. The tiny cupcake looked adorable in her reindeer onesie and Santa hat that seemed permanently glued onto her head.

A happy tear slid down her face when she realized this was the first real Christmas they'll spend as an official couple. Together, happy, and in love. She let out a gentle sigh and gazed at the flurries of snow outside the living room window, falling onto the busy streets of New York.

"Well, that was a kick." Carmilla says, her heart at peace. She brushes a piece of hair out of Laura's face, and places a kiss on her cheek. She leans her head back on the couch and closes her eyes.

It really _was_ a miracle.

They had a future now.

Whatever happens next, they'll get through this together.

But this. Right here. This is what mattered.

**THE END**

**Author's Note:**

> don we now our gAY APPAREL FA LA LA LA LA LA LA AL ALAAAAAA *puts on flannel*


End file.
